You want Help: Could It Be Normal to Feel Sensuous Once You Gain Weight? (Yes) | Autostraddle

by mey, vanessa & kaelyn

Q:

Is-it a thing that gaining weight helps make some people think hot? I am not discussing feedee, We’m-skinny-but-want-to-gain-500-lbs mindset, though if that’s the thing, even more power to you. I have simply for ages been very thin obviously but I have already been captivated and just a little turned on of the concept of having somewhat fluffiness and curves. I presently consider by far the most i’ve inside my existence by a bit (thank you so much, wintertime and breaks), and with the exclusion of perhaps needing to buy some larger shorts, I kind of like it and was interested in learning exactly what a few more pounds would resemble. I understand I am not totally crazy but i cannot apparently discover anyone who has exactly the same moderate degree of interest when I carry out. I attempted googling things such as “gaining fat tends to make me feel hot,” nevertheless only results were shit like “how to still feel sexy after you have gained weight” and help message boards regarding what to do in case the boyfriend is no longer attracted to you, which forced me to feel truly sorry the globe. Any a few ideas?

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A:

Mey, Trans Publisher

Genuinely, we freaking love my figure and exactly how the weight of my body feels pressed facing some other person. I favor that there surely is so much of my own body for my personal partners to the touch and hug and feel and get near. I like that my personal ass is very large and this cannot be overlooked. Before I had gender, I disliked that I happened to be fat. It is not something is actually appropriate for females as, particularly if those women should feel sexy. But now, I like it. Getting big provides plenty things into the bedroom. I could have two lovers rest to my nerves likewise. I will have scars remaining back at my ass that people could merely dream about. My partners can seize whole handfuls of my body system and that I’ve nevertheless got a lot more than they’re able to manage. My own body is really so big and hot and gentle that i will hold my sweetheart comfortable forever without a blanket. Like, there is the Mary Lambert track, “She helps myself Warm,” that’s about me. And it’s really about me personally because i am excess fat.

Some time ago, we developed the word Big Momma Bottom to spell it out my self as I’m not-being a Bratty Bottom. The key word is “Big.” I love taking care of men and women and that I like getting looked after and that I like how being large matches into those narratives. I prefer the dimensions of my human body and the way We fill in my clothes and occupy an entire mirror when I’m getting selfies. It generates myself feel powerful and beautiful and effective. I’m an elephant, a mountain, a force of character. In regards to down to it, i like having curves and I love getting excess fat. This is the most readily useful form of my body. In addition, my personal favorite trope in gay fandoms now is large Femme/Little Butch, anytime my dimensions assists me be an integral part of that, which makes me enjoy it much more.

In my opinion that while “gaining body weight helps make me feel gorgeous” will not be “anything” based on “google,” feeling comfortable in your body and achieving a body that you want to possess, and this leading to you feeling beautiful is. Yeah, we are instructed that we should not would you like to gain weight, additionally, everybody differs and every person is different and that I’m actually happy which you discovered a way to build your body feel it’s best. There’s nothing a lot better than learning the manner in which you like your system the most, therefore’ve completed that. Don’t allow anyone make us feel poor or odd because of it.

KaeLyn, associates publisher

I adore that you are loving the figure and wishing even more figure! I am in addition very unfortunate your prominent narrative for females (also lesbian, bisexual and queer women) usually slim could be the perfect frame. Against all chances, you circulated yourself from legendary bullshit that’s the diet-culture-loving, fat-shaming, self-worth-crushing heteropatriarchy. The thing I’m saying is you’re an evolved individual. I’m very delighted for you personally!

I am in addition the biggest I ever before been and also the happiest I previously been. It took me sometime to have right here and that I have times as I think, “If only i really could go some of this weight from my personal two fold chin area to my butt.” Then again i believe about precisely how precious i’m and draw a great cat attention and wiggle my personal tummy chubbs and place in some garments that feel good for me and move forward. I’m with you that excess fat figures tend to be appealing and I also in addition believe that’s not regular — but only relating to what the patriarchy imposes as our norms — very thank you for visiting getting not normal in an effective way with me and Mey and Vanessa and lots of some other queers! Queer and lesbian society is all about deliberately banging in the patriarchy by challenging why is individuals “attractive.”

I love a curvy partner that isn’t scared to flaunt her figure or the woman cleavage or the woman chins or her butt or hips or whatever areas of her body she wishes… or not! I had slim lovers and excess fat associates and I also’ve gotta point out that there is something concerning the way my personal excess fat lovers thought against my fat body that’s so soft and lovely and secure. There aren’t any sides or tough things, merely heat and best smoosh, like we simply fill each other completely up.

Vanessa, Community Editor

The small answer to your question is YES! The longer response to your enquiry is HELL YES!

No, but honestly, i believe it’s really “something” that getting fatter tends to make some people feel gorgeous. As Mey and KaeLyn (along with your original concern) express, the patriarchy and the principal narrative inside our thin-obsessed society will be lose shed drop some weight always, but that story is actually fatphobic as well as tunnel-visioned and does not account for just how various bodies and characters and all sorts of facets of an individual existence can be found in this field.

I adore my fat body, and I also love my partner’s fat human body, and I also think there is something very honestly hot about excess fat bodies

because

they’re fat, maybe not regardless of it. I feel nervous creating this, like someone is going to pop out with the carpentry and shout “HOW ABOUT THIN BODS STAYING GORGEOUS” but lez be genuine, each of us hear about thin bods becoming hot all of the damn time. We obtain it! So I have always been here to express, loud and clear: excess fat bods tend to be hella beautiful.

And also the other point, which requires some nuance to fairly share so every person hold your own breath along with your commentary and go with me in good faith down this course for a moment: wanting to put on pounds to feel sensuous and good and great in your bod is not actually actually grounded on excess fat acceptance or excess fat love or human body positivity specifically. Some folks tend to be recovering from ingesting issues and gaining a couple of pounds makes them feel just like they’re progressing, some folks have been unwell and dropped a few pounds once they gain weight it is a relief and helps them feel much healthier, some folks simply think their particular bods are too thin and now have difficulty wearing fat when they do its triumphant and exciting.

I believe the theory that putting on weight is bad might-be from the cause of your own concern. The inspiration of your question rests from the indisputable fact that people couldn’t come to be happy with gaining weight, consequently they are always aiming for dieting. But gaining weight and weight reduction don’t even talk with the reality of just what a fat human body and just what a thin human anatomy and just what all systems in-between resemble.

The true question, maybe, is it: Could it possibly be okay that enjoying exactly what my body appears to be — instead contorting me to match impractical, oppressive, patriarchal beauty criteria — makes me feel sexy?

And my personal response is just like it had been at the beginning. In short: yes. In lengthy: HELL. YES.